lame master
2004-04-10 - 12:15 p.m.

Last night I was eating with B. at an Indian restaurant. Now this was one of the restaurants in Little India that is kind of crammed into a basement and is always absolutely packed on a weekend, so it's always very close quarters.

The people sitting next to us were two guys. They were pretty unremarkable except that one had some sort of Euro accent and they had Century 21 bags which they asked if they could put on the chair next to me. Anyway B. and I ate our meal, and the couple next to us finished up a bit earlier than us and left.

B. turns to me and says "Those guys were such butt pirates" like it was amazingly amusing that you might sit next to A GAY COUPLE.

What the hell? Ok, so you can't handle eating next to a gay couple? First of all, who knows if these guys were dating or what. Second of all, they were acting just like any other polite couple would, they weren't groping each other and they weren't giving off that Bad Date Vibe that I absolutely hate. (There is nothing worse than having to sit next to two miserable people on a date, the girl usually gets very snotty about it and it's not cool if you're all sitting very close.)

I'm pretty sure B. is Deep Closeted as I really haven't met any other guys who act like he does - well, I have met a few but they generally tend to be either younger or living somewhere where that style of homophobia is well, more practical. This has happened before - we were once walking to a restaurant or something when I pointed out something on the street, saying "Look at that!" and he replies, loudly, "Oh, that gay couple?" with a snigger. I hadn't even seen a couple (I was pointing at a giant Captain Morgan strapped onto a truck) but it was so embarrassing. I wanted to wear a sign that said "I HAVE SEEN GAY COUPLES BEFORE I HAVE PASSED THE MENTAL AGE OF TWELVE."

I don't mind going places with B., but he really is a tool.

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